Section 9

But let us see how, once he had received her, the marriage was celebrated. Did he bring along cymbals and pipes and dancing and drums and flutes and all the rest of such display? None of these. He took her alone and departed, with the angel accompanying her and traveling with them—the angel whom his master had begged God to send with him when he left the house.

So the bride was led away without hearing flutes or lyres or any of those things, but with countless blessings from God upon her head, a crown brighter than any diadem. She went not clothed in garments of gold, but in chastity, reverence, hospitality, and every other virtue. She went not in a covered carriage or with any other such display, but seated on a camel.

For in ancient times young women possessed not only virtue of soul but also great physical hardiness. Their mothers did not raise them as mothers do now, corrupting them in countless ways with frequent baths, applications of perfumes, painted cosmetics, soft clothing, and other things, making them softer than they ought to be. Instead they trained them in every kind of hardiness. For this reason their bodily bloom was strong and genuine, because it was natural rather than manufactured or cultivated. They also enjoyed sound health, and their beauty was extraordinary because no illness troubled the body and all softness had been driven away. Labor, hardship, and doing things with their own hands drove away weakness and provided strength and health with great security. For this reason they were also more desirable and attractive to their husbands, because such discipline had made not only their bodies but also their souls better and more chaste.

Rebekah, then, was sitting on the camel. When she reached the country, before she came near, she looked up and saw Isaac with her own eyes, and she jumped down from the camel. Do you see her strength? Do you see her physical vigor? “She jumped down from the camel.” Such strength was joined to their chastity. And she said to the servant, “Who is that man walking in the field?” The servant replied, “He is my master.” Then she took her veil and covered herself.

Notice how her chastity is witnessed everywhere—how modest and reverent she was. “Isaac took her, and she became his wife, and he loved her; and he was comforted concerning Sarah his mother.” Scripture did not simply say that he loved her and was comforted concerning Sarah his mother. It said this so that you might learn the grounds of the affection and love with which the woman arrived from her own home. Who would not love such a woman—so chaste, so orderly, so hospitable, kind, and gentle, courageous in soul and strong in body?

I have said these things not merely so that you may hear them, nor merely so that after hearing them you may praise them, but so that you may imitate them. Fathers, imitate the patriarch's care in seeking a wife without pretense. He did not seek money, distinguished birth, physical beauty, or anything else, but nobility of soul alone. Mothers, raise your daughters in this way. And you bridegrooms who are about to take wives, take them with such dignity: banish dancing, laughter, shameful speech, pipes, flutes, devilish display, and all other such things, and always ask God to become the mediator in everything that is done.

If we order our affairs in this way, there will never be divorce, suspicion of adultery, grounds for jealousy, fighting, or strife. Instead we will enjoy great peace and great harmony, and where these are present all the other virtues will surely follow. For just as, when a wife is at odds with her husband, nothing in the household will be sound even if all other affairs run smoothly, so when husband and wife live in harmony and peace, nothing will be unpleasant even if ten thousand storms arise every day.

If marriages are formed in this way, we will also be able to lead our children toward virtue with great ease. For when the mother is orderly and chaste and possesses every virtue, she will certainly be able to win her husband and bring him under her sway through his love for her. And once she has won him, she will have him eagerly helping in the care of the children, and in this way she will also draw God toward the same care. When He takes hold with them of this good ordering and trains the souls of the children, nothing unpleasant will remain. The affairs of the household will also be well ordered because those who govern it are so disposed.

In this way each man will be able, together with his household—I mean his wife, children, and servants—to pass through this present life with complete security and to enter the kingdom of heaven. May all of us attain it by the grace and loving kindness of our Lord Jesus Christ, with whom be glory and power to the Father, together with the holy and life-giving Spirit, now and always and to the ages of ages. Amen.